|Marbled paper 1990|
Then this morning as I realize what I have been doing, in the past 3 months, in spite of unpacking boxes and purging, is that I HAVE been creating something. I have a goal in the back of my mind that is always emerging as I move a box from one corner to the other, not quite ready to take on its contents, or releasing items that have only held emotional connections for me.
I realize it is the memory, not the thing, so I snap a photo of the thing with my iphone and let it go. Maybe I will do a collage or something some day. There are some things though, a tangible item that a dear person who is no longer in my life may have touched. A sort of evidence and physical reminder of their existence. More like a channel to them, to experience being in the moment with them, one more time.
As I let go of things and hang on to memories, I am forced to sort them, to file them in my heart, not keeping them cluttering the foreground for any new blessing to trip over. Instead in a sacred place dedicated in honor, a location that I can retrieve and re-PLACE, should I wish that experience for any length of time. A moment may be all that I need or desire.
Yes, what I realize I am creating is order. An order for my past to reside within, with built in flexibility to accommodate an ever expanding future. Life will no longer pile up in the doorway, scattered across the floor to step over and be reminded of incompletions. It is time to pick up the laundry, neatly fold the clothes and put them away in closets and drawers.
In preparation for writing this blog, I have organized topics and have sub categories of how to best communicate them. Actions are being taking, one small, baby step at a time to keep it orderly and fluid. Thus a context and expression in my life for all of the things that interest, inspire and have me being alive.
What makes me feel alive is a unique blend of images, thoughts, values and relationships. The relationships are the result. How to relate to these things, places and people. What has you feeling alive? Which takes precedence for you? Does the order of your things, in your places reflect the relationships you have with people? Which are most important to you?
No matter where you are in the creative cycle, find the beauty where you are, ground yourself in it. There is after all beauty in chaos too! http://www.chaos.umd.edu/gallery.html